Have you ever heard of developing your child’s
social and emotional skill? Do you think it is essential to develop this in
your little kids? Well here is what you need to know. Social-emotional learning
is basically recognizing our emotions, having some control over them, having
empathy for others, handling conflict well, and making good choices about
personal and social behavior. These skills are critical to every child’s
success, be it in school or in life.
Believe it or not, these things need to be taught
and the best time to begin is early! Right when they are preschool and
kindergarten! And who is a better teacher to your child than YOU? Here are some specific steps you can take to nurture
an emotionally intelligent child, and additional resources you can use to learn
more about social and emotional learning.
Create
an Affectionate-Friendly Environment:
Children love to feel like they are the most special
and important, so make sure you provide them with love and affection. Don’t
always let your child be independent. Holding your children makes them feel
safe and contained. Comforting, singing, and talking to your children also
provide an important emotional holding environment. It promotes a feeling of
safety and security within your young child. As children receive love and
affection from their elders, parents and relatives, they are also silently learning
important aspects of how they can express their love and affection to others.
Encourage
and Respect Differences:
Every child has a certain belief, values, and traditions.
These are often largely influenced by the culture of the family and their
larger community. It influences every aspect of parenting: feeding, sleeping,
and toileting routines; discipline; communication and more. When you display an
appreciation and respect for your own culture as well as the cultures of
others, you are teaching your child acceptance of differences and lets them
appreciate what is unique in another.
Understand Each Child is Unique:
Not all children are good at
everything. Every child has his or her own unique talents and abilities.
Whether in academics, athletics, extra-curricular activities or arts and crafts,
resist the urge to compare your child to friends or siblings. This will lower
their self-esteem. Instead, honor your child's accomplishments and provide
support and encouragement and in the meantime also encourage them to
concentrate on what they may be falling back on.
Encourage
the Expression of Feelings:
Children are not sure how exactly to express their
emotions. They may also express it without thought. Teachers and parents can
encourage a child’s emotional expressions by responding constructively to them.
Punishing or dismissing a child’s emotions does not give the child the
opportunity to learn how to respond constructively to those emotions. Respond
to a child’s emotions by validating her feelings. For example, ask your child,
“What’s wrong?” rather than saying,
“Stop crying.”
Provide
Support Occasionally:
You can support your child’s social and emotional
skills through scaffolding. It’s built upon what children already know, such as
the names of basic emotions, so that they can learn new skills, like how to
identify when a playmate is sad or happy. You can guide a child to notice the
feelings of another and also suggest possible solutions. For example, “Rose is
crying, maybe she feels sad that no one is playing with her, why don’t you go
and share your toys with her. I’m pretty sure she will be happy.”
Nurture
Your Own Social and Emotional Wellness:
This is the most important aspect. To provide the best
for your children, you must first attend to your own needs. You need to ensure
that you are nurturing and respecting yourself. Parenting is rewarding, yet so demanding.
So before you are about to react a particular way towards your child make sure
that you are doing it right and in a calm manner. Children
are observing and absorbing lessons about emotions throughout the day, even
when those lessons are unintentional. So
make sure you are doing it all right yourself.
Written
by Fathima Khaja
